wAitInG

i am waiting for those days to come...
waiting for it...
especially Christmas's eve
Christmas that day itself
the day after i finished my final exam...
the day i can have my holidays...

i think it might be fun on Christmas's eve night....
waiting for the programs that well prepared by them..
curious what will be the programs and what will happen on that day

although i did not go back kuantan for my Christmas
and yet this is the first time not going back
but he celebrate with me...
you hope i stay at KL but you wanted me to go back....
i think you had been thinking this for so long right??
actually i had make decision before i asked you that question
that's why i am not going back
besides,
my mum just asked me to stay..

i think i have not been going to their gathering for more than half a year...
this time...
i thought i am going back
and yet i told my friends
but end up...
i cannot make it
feel like so sorry to my friends
my primary school's friends, MC4clanz, my church's friends....
i think for sure can meet you all next year
but i think you all will be busy that time....

i just wanna finish my final exam now...
sometimes feel stress in it...
i have no confident for this semester...
i scare i might fail in some subject....
is a MUST for me to passed it...
i cannot fail in any subject
but i think is quite hard for me too...
going to study hard from now onwards...
cannot let anything to stop from it...

holidays..............
i love holidays
because at least i am free for some days....
with no study problems....
and of cause i can have my favorite foods that sell in kuantan
so long...
almost 3 months have not eating them
miss all the foods
start listing up the foods that i wanna eat when i go back...
waiting for it...

ReAlLy TiReD

i really feel tired...
i got no more idea in what to do....
some said what i did is still considered ok...
some said what i did is wicked and off....
so what shall i do??
i don't think i can follow others to do things right??
Mr.A said i am right
Mr.B said i am wrong...
so??i should stand at which side??

maybe most of you agree that i really changed
and i might change to a person that you don't know
i might change to a scary person
i might smile in front of you but actually i am thinking in my heart on how to so called 'kill' or hurt you...
this is what people think of me now...
maybe yes
maybe no

just tired of all these...
i do not know why a small matters can just turn up like this....
i also do not know why all these happened...
i thought everything just settle down easily...
but actually cannot....

one thing just come into my mind is...
relationship is hard to maintain
especially boy girl relationship...
friendship...
easy to start for these two relationship
but once things happened...
hard to solve it...
anyway..
scare of it...

what i wrote in my blog just to write out all my feeling
i don't meant anything inside here
i might write this
but the day after tomorrow
i might forget about it...
so...
it is not letting people to point all the mistakes
and also saying i am wrong...
i think i should end with...
i am not a good blogger...

tAlKiNg

i think i had been emphasize this a lots of times...
what you speak is just come out from your heart...
while you think so much,
then those angry feeling will just store in your heart and finally
you just do it by action or by talking

trust or don't trust depend on how you look at me...
different people have different view when looking at me as jasmine
and i cannot control the way you look at me,right??
i cannot change your view or comment on me...
so...
no point i keep on explain on i did and so on....
i am no those person that like to give explanation...
i will not like to give explanation when i am wrong
for me,
wrong means wrong
correct means correct
don't change the facts...
and those people who know me well
they know that i don't like to explain
if you do not know this....
i tell you now......

i treat everyone the same...
you might think that i treat you like treating a ball
got problems will find you
no problems...bye...get out from my life...
i am not those kind of people....
but who can really understand that
actually college life is not that free or easy....

today
finally finished
macroeconomics' coursework
what can i said for that??
one word can explain all...
DIE...
just cannot imagine what will i get for this
pass or fail??
afraid to think of it...
i think is time for me to start study...
wanna go back to my old life in order to get better results...
gambateh to all of my friends who start preparing for final exam...

tagged by David

i tag
1:kelven
2:pit ling
3:su jean
4:woon yee
5:shi min
6:shirley
7:hong thong

How you know 1?
from church,shalom fellowship since 2006

What would you do if you never meet 2?
will try my best to find out who is that person

What would you do if 3&4 dated you?
erm....i don't think they will date me...because they will dated "someone"

Would 5&6 make a good couple?
erm...nO....

Do you think 4 is attractive?
she is sexy....haha...

Do you know anything about 1's family?
yes....he have father,mother,sister ,brother

Tell me something about 7?
She is a good solver to settle down all those chasing problem

What language does 2 speaks?
mandarin

Who is 3 going out with?
curry chicken

How old is 5?
same as me..

When was the last time u talk to 1?
i think one week before today

Who is 6's favorite singer?
i don't know T.T

Would you date 7?
i think so because she look busy than me

6 single?
i guess so..

What is 5's last name?
min

Would you consider being in a relationship with 1?
NO!!!!! the answer is definitely no

Which school does 2 goes to?
Tunku Abdul Rahman College..

What do you like about 3?
always in blur situation....

cHrIsTmAs cEl3bRatIoN

there is a Christmas celebrate at Kuala Lumpur International Hotel.....
on Christmas eve that night....
happy...
and i am waiting that day to come...
do not know why...
Christmas bring some special of feeling to me...
but on Christmas that itself got no planned on how to celebrate
because i no more in kuantan this Christmas...
therefore got no plan
besides,
KL here sure got lots of people whenever we go especially on Christmas
so...
stay at home better right??

just feel like soon will having boring Christmas
somehow,
he know i did not go back kuantan
and he planned to celebrate with me...
happy to hear that...
at least he come to celebrate with me...
his caring just touch me lots
i know thanks cannot replace everything that he did
somehow,
still need to say thanks right??
this mean that i really appreciate what you did for me since the beginning until now...

yEs oR nO

actually i planned so long that i am going back on Christmas that day
i thought i can celebrate at my home church...
but when i called back
they celebrate on Christmas eve
so it seem like i cannot join them
because my class end at 6pm
even when i rush back,
the event just will end once i reached
so...
no going back this Christmas.....
i told my friends that i going back
and now not going back,
and miss those gathering again
owh.........
and of cause miss the chance that can talk with my friends...
sorry......my friends........

this time is my first time not going back home for 2months over.......
if my parent did not came KL
i think i will only have chance next year....

this few days keep on getting call from my mum and sister about staying problems
there is very troublesome when we got no house at KL
staying at others' house is like troublesome and also not that good....
i keep on thinking those problems that happened.....
i really cannot think of better way to solve it...
so...
the conclusion is they will stay with me when they come to KL....

fInaLlY fInIshEd

today is the last day for us to join curriculum
finally.....
i been joining tennis around 8 weeks
learned a lots of things...
of course tennis consider a new sport for me too....
quite tiring but really fun........

i am late for curriculum day
do not know why i just don't feeling well....
since last night until this morning...
luckily,
he is there when i really sick.....
he take care me yesterday night....
i think he whole night don't sleep well.....
thanks....

somehow
finally finished curriculum for this semester..
i can start to focus in my studied now....
must pass all the subject for this semester......
this is my aim............